This pick is interesting to me because I can tell that A/r/tography is creeping into my life; I have looked at this lamp many times before and I have never noticed the lines in the textile. I have been noticing lines in a lot of things lately, actually.
The light through the shade has repeatedly captivated me. I have been sitting in this spot frequently, doing school work, or grading…report cards even. Despite the fact that its where my gaze goes when I become distracted, I have never focused on the lines.
The memory that floated in and out was the memory of myself in Grade 3. I was the student was usually started the year near a window, and before the yellow and red leaves fell to the ground in October, I had been moved spots- for looking out the window too much. Being too distracted. I always felt like I was on the wrong side of the glass.
On my third drawing, I found it so funny that I took my “cheat” time to look at my drawing…..but was distracted back to looking at the lamp, which is the opposite reaction I have had with this experience. I wanted more to look at the object as I found more lines, more detail, and wanted to explore that.
Take breath Nicole. If the picture doesn’t look like what you are supposed to be drawing, thats ok. Take a breath. On day three of Daily Art Practice, I decided to take a breath while I was drawing. I put on music. My kids were not in the house, so I was alone. I think this was a monumental part of my experience. As I dive into the “tensions” and the “in-betweens” of my narrative and this art practice, I have to admit to myself just how utterly stressful it it be a working, student, mother.
This is Zoey’s Brown Bear. He was sitting on my desk, so he is what I drew. He has so many lines to his fur. I have not noticed that before. I guess he is more than just a Brown Bear. I guess I am more than just a mom.
My breathing flowed. I wondered what Brown Bear looks like to my kids, do they pay attention to his lines, and this is me just noticing now? Is it returning to a childlike perspective that I truly need? To see things through their eyes once in a while? Brown Bear, he is a fly on the wall in our house. Through this experience of graduate studies and parenting and working and living life, that is now coming to an end in some aspect…what did Brown Bear actually see?